Autonomy I am living without you because of a terror, a farfetched notion that I can't live without you which I must narrow down & quell, for how can I live worthy of you, in the freedom of you limber engagements, in the casual uptakes of your sweetest compliances if stricken in your presence by what your absence stills: to have you, I school myself to let you go; how terrible to buy that absence before the fragrance of any presence comes: but though I am living without you, surely I can't live without you: the thought of you hauls my heavy body up, floats me around, gives my motions point, just the thought. A.R. Ammons